If your family was anything like mine, bragging was discouraged. Do you remember being admonished not to brag? Not to be too full of yourself? And now here we are — many of us — entrepreneurs, soul-preneurs, professionals in private practice, the tribe of Conscious Creators, caregivers, healers, writers, authors, artists.
Everyone is being asked to market — not only products, services, but ourselves! With the old family tapes running in the background, it’s not easy. How are you supposed to talk about yourself, your services, your projects, creations, ventures, and businesses without what sounds suspiciously like “bragging” — at least to those old critical deeply internalized voices?
And some of us are pushing the envelope even more: We are determined to stand fully in our power and presence, to finally shine our light full on. Now that’s something those internalized voices of yesteryear really perceive as over the top. It’s like an internal thermostat. Nope. Not THAT visible. “That’s even worse than bragging,” the internalized critic seems to say.
What to do? How do we work around the critic? How to come out with the work and be able to stand in our own power and possibility?
What if that inner critic is doing its best to protect you? Based on the old programming, of course, but doing its best nevertheless. What if we could enter into a conversation with that inner critical voice? I can hear the guffaws already.
Here’s an excerpt of what I told Ronna Detrick over at her Renegade Conversations site. It’s all about an approach that befriends those troublesome inner voices.
In Ronna’s post, she wrote: “…far more about my deepest, age-old insecurities. They rear their ugly heads in times of fear. They are familiar. And I fight to keep them at bay.”
What I suggested is: “What if you didn’t? Fight to keep them at bay? What if you were simply able to be curious? What if you had a conversation with them? What if you sat with them and let them sit with you? What if you said, “Thank you. I’m curious. What are you trying to protect me from? You’ve done such an amazing job of protecting me. Can we talk about this?”
Open a dialogue. Put it on paper. Say thank you to the parts who are doing their best, perhaps based on old programs or instructions. And talk to them. Take your strength and your gift, (and yes, Ronna is amazing at nurturing deep conversations) turn it on that part of yourself that seems so troubling. Bring it into the conversational circle. Let it have its say.
Your protectors are there to protect you. You don’t have to squash them or get rid of them. You just have to talk to them, get them to work WITH you and your dreams and your purpose instead of against it. I know…it’s a lesson I have to keep learning over and over again. But it merits consideration I think.
This advice is inspired in part by the True Purpose and parts work of Tim Kelley and Jeffery Van Dyk over at True Purpose.
There’s also a Parts work workshop. To find out more: Audios from Aligning Your Psyche Teleclass 6/11 & Understanding Your Psyche Teleclass 5/25